Food and Loathing
A Lament
Betsy Lerner
- Never
- before
- Food
- and
- Loathing
- has
- the
- intimate
- relationship
- between
- mood
- swings
- and
- food
- swings
- been
- so
- honestly
- chronicled.
- As
- a
- bright
- but
- chubby
- girl,
- Betsy
- Lerner
- believed
- that
- thinness
- was
- the
- key
- to
- success
- with
- friends
- and
- boys.
- By
- junior
- high,
- she
- had
- precisely
- divided
- the
- world
- of
- food
- into
- two
- camps:
- the
- dietetic
- and
- the
- forbidden.
- Becoming
- a
- member
- of
- the
- then-fledgling
- Overeaters
- Anonymous,
- she
- formed
- a
- cult-like
- devotion
- to
- the
- program
- and
- lost
- fifty
- pounds
- in
- a
- matter
- of
- months,
- only
- to
- gain
- it
- all
- back
- and
- more.
- "I
- am
- powerless
- over
- Hostess
- cakes,"
- she
- writes,
- "and
- my
- life
- has
- become
- unmanageable."Her
- twenties
- are
- marked
- by
- yo-yo
- dieting,
- depressive
- episodes,
- and
- a
- sadistic
- shrink
- who
- dubs
- her
- "the
- boy
- who
- cried
- wolf."
- Then,
- just
- as
- Lerner
- begins
- to
- realize
- her
- dream
- of
- becoming
- a
- writer,
- entering
- Columbia's
- prestigious
- MFA
- program,
- she
- spirals
- into
- a
- suicidal
- depression
- and
- lands
- at
- New
- York
- State
- Psychiatric
- Institute.
- There,
- a
- young
- doctor
- helps
- her
- take
- her
- first
- steps
- toward
- selfhood
- and
- unraveling
- the
- dual
- legacy
- of
- compulsion
- and
- depression.A
- powerfully
- rendered
- story
- for
- anyone
- who
- has
- every
- wielded
- a
- fork
- in
- despair
- or
- calculated
- her
- worth
- on
- the
- morning scale.
pro-mbooks3 : libris
