Love Me Sane

Leesfragment
€4,39
  • My
  • name
  • is
  • Stacey
  • Jones.
  • I
  • honestly
  • believe
  • that
  • my
  • sole
  • purpose
  • for
  • being
  • on
  • Earth
  • is
  • to
  • establish
  • a
  • solid
  • trusting
  • relationship
  • with
  • a
  • loving
  • God
  • so
  • that
  • I
  • may
  • spend
  • an
  • eternity
  • with
  • him
  • in
  • heaven.
  • How
  • can
  • I
  • build
  • a
  • connection
  • with
  • a
  • God
  • who
  • sometimes
  • seems
  • evasive,
  • unrealistic
  • and
  • egocentric?
  • I
  • should
  • be
  • ashamed
  • to
  • say
  • this,
  • but
  • I've
  • blessed
  • and
  • cursed
  • Jesus
  • in
  • the
  • same
  • breath.
  • Later,
  • I'm
  • asking
  • for
  • forgiveness.
  • Is
  • this
  • too
  • much
  • information
  • for
  • the
  • "perfect
  • Christian"?
  • I'm
  • sure
  • you've
  • passed
  • all
  • tested
  • trials
  • with
  • flying
  • colors.
  • You
  • think
  • this
  • is
  • a
  • secret
  • I
  • should
  • keep
  • to
  • myself?
  • I
  • disagree.
  • I
  • wish
  • I
  • could
  • say
  • life's
  • been
  • good
  • and
  • worth
  • living,
  • but
  • there
  • have
  • been
  • many
  • days
  • when
  • I've
  • begged
  • the
  • "Good
  • Lord"
  • to
  • take
  • me
  • out
  • of
  • here.
  • I've
  • always
  • been
  • somebody's
  • perfect
  • victim.
  • My
  • questions
  • scare
  • the
  • "ideal
  • Christians."
  • I
  • pretend
  • like
  • everything's
  • okay,
  • singing
  • songs
  • of
  • praise
  • and
  • worshipping
  • a
  • God
  • I
  • don't
  • understand,
  • who
  • disappears
  • just
  • when
  • I
  • think
  • I'm
  • getting
  • close
  • to
  • him.
  • Rod
  • believes
  • this
  • is
  • blasphemy
  • so
  • I'm
  • trapped.
  • I
  • look
  • to
  • heaven
  • and
  • scream,
  • "Enough
  • already."
  • I
  • don't
  • want
  • to
  • go
  • to
  • hell.
  • I've
  • taken
  • chances
  • on
  • Rod's
  • convictions.
  • But,
  • now
  • I've
  • reached
  • my
  • spiritual
  • bottom.
  • His
  • faith
  • can
  • no
  • longer
  • sustain
  • me.
  • I'm
  • not
  • ashamed
  • to
  • ask,
  • "Will
  • you
  • trudge
  • with
  • me
  • on
  • this
  • journey
  • to
  • find
  • my
  • God? Show
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